Some lame jokes to "liven" up the blog lol Monday, May 18, 2009 8:19 PM
JOKES + TONGUE TWISTERS
CLASS TIME
The class was very noisy just now because there wasn't any teacher, but now everyone suddenly turned quiet. That is because the fiercest teacher in the school had entered the class. Her face is as fierce as a lion which will bite anyone's head off if offended... And if you wanna know more.... follow the lesson.
Students: Good morning, teacher.
Teacher : (shouting) Why is it only good morning? What about afternoon and night?
Students: Good morning, afternoon and night teacher!
Teacher : That is unacceptable! It is too long. Just wish me best regards for my whole day! That is much better as it is easier and full of meaning. And that greeting can also be used for all times.
Students: Best regards teacher!
Teacher : That's better, sit down! Listen today I,m going to test you all on words that have the opposite meaning. When I say a sentence or word, all of you must answer quickly the opposite meaning to the words, understand?
Students: Understood teacher!
Teacher : I do not want any disturbance!
Students: (silence)
Teacher : Clever!
Students: Stupid!
Teacher : High!
Students: Low!
Teacher : Popular!
Students: Calafare!
Teacher : Wrong!
Students: Correct!
Teacher : Stupid!
Students: Clever!
Teacher : No!
Students: Yes!
Teacher : Oh God!
Students: Oh Slave!
Teacher : Listen to this!
Students: Listen to that!
Teacher : Quiet!
Students: Noisy!
Teacher : That's not a question, stupid!
Students: This is an answer, clever!
Teacher : I'm dead!
Students: We're alive!
Teacher : I'm lazy to teach!
Students: We are hardworking to learn!
Teacher : Enough! Enough!
Students: More! More!
Teacher : Stop! Stop!
Students: Start! Start!
Teacher : Why are you people so stupid?!
Students: Because I am someone clever!
Teacher : Lack manners!
Students: Taught enough!
Teacher : O.K. Lesson has ended!
Students: K.O. Lesson has not started!
Teacher : Enough, stupid!
Students: Not yet, clever!
Teacher : Stand up!
Students: Sit down!
Teacher : I said CALAFARE was wrong!
Students: We said POPULAR was correct!
Teacher : You people are dumb!
Students: We are gifted!
Teacher : All of you must stay back this afternoon!
Students: Released tonight!
Teacher : (Keep quiet, gather her books and went out)
lame huh? Im bored lol.
Here are some tongue twisters:
Sally sells seashells by the seashore. The shells Sally sells surely won’t sail But since Sally sells sea shells and not ship sails, Surely she’ll sell all the shiny sea shells she’s soon shipping on sale.
There once was a woman Named Uma Mona Newman She nimbly made feminine M&Ms
She didn’t like a lot of ‘em She only liked the minimum She loved the mini-cinnamon And the aluminum chrysanthemum.
So Uma Mona Newman Nimbly made for the millennium A minimum of feminine Yummy mini-cinnamon Chrysanthemum aluminum M&Ms.
If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could,and chuck as much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk
Betty Botter bought some butter, but she said “this butter’s bitter! But a bit of better butter will but make my butter better” So she bought some better butter, better than the bitter butter, and it made her butter better so ’twas better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter!
A flea and a fly flew up in a flue. Said the flea, “Let us fly!” Said the fly, “Let us flee!” So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, where’s the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
Perspicacious Polly Perkins purchased Peter Piper’s pickled products And peddled pretty popular pickles to produce a pretty proper profit!
If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, It’s slick to stick a lock upon your stock, Or some stickler who is slicker Will stick you of your liquor If you fail to lock your liquor With a lock!
Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now, See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See’s saw Before See sawed Soar’s seesaw, See’s saw would not have sawed Soar’s seesaw. So See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw. But it was sad to see Soar so sore just because See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw.
Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott say she shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott, then Shott was shot, not Nott.
However, the shot Shott shot shot shot Nott not Shott.
Greek grapes go great draped on crates of crushed dates.
There was a young fisher named Fischer Who fished for a fish in a fissure. The fish with a grin, Pulled the fisherman in; Now they’re fishing the fissure for Fischer.
AMKSS 3/5 (2009)
since 2nd January'09
25 girls & 15 boys
Form Teacher: Ms Zaiton Md Ali
English: Mdm Komathi Anand
AE Mathematics: Ms Lee Wei Jun
Higher Chinese: Ms Jin Bei Hua
Chinese: Mdm Justina Goh/Mdm Yeo Leng
Biology: Mrs Eunice Chan
Chemistry: Ms Tay Siew Peng
Physics: Mrs Yeo Chai Hoon/Ms Chew Xiang Yun
Social Studies: Ms Zaiton Md Ali
Geography Elective: Mrs Habibah Ismail
History Elective: Mr Goh Lye Hock
Art: Ms Juliana Tay
Music: Ms Sandra Chen
Physical Education: Mr Lian Chee Seng
Members
Alicia Tan
Alice Kor
Amelia Goh
Bernice Koh
Clara Wong
Chong Xin Hui
Demi Lum
Jia Yun
Jasmine Han
Joanne Wong
Kareen Chan
Mendi Ang
Michelle Wong
Ong May Xian
Phua Si Jing
Png Shi Min
Reiko Ang
Tan Share Ler
Teoh Wei Lin
Toh Ying Ying
Toh Wang Ling
Tan Yi Zhen
Stefanie Lim
Seet Min Yi
Wong Shiau Yin
Ang Junhao
Ang Wei Xiang
Foo Zheng Hui
Francis Guan
Goh You Hui
Jonathan Phang
Lim Fang Hong
Low Yong Han
Michael Utama
Shawn Tay
Tan Jing Jie
Tan Zheng Jie
Tiew Jia Quan
Wong Jun Meng
Wong Teng Kiat
Some lame jokes to "liven" up the blog lol Monday, May 18, 2009 8:19 PM
JOKES + TONGUE TWISTERS
CLASS TIME
The class was very noisy just now because there wasn't any teacher, but now everyone suddenly turned quiet. That is because the fiercest teacher in the school had entered the class. Her face is as fierce as a lion which will bite anyone's head off if offended... And if you wanna know more.... follow the lesson.
Students: Good morning, teacher.
Teacher : (shouting) Why is it only good morning? What about afternoon and night?
Students: Good morning, afternoon and night teacher!
Teacher : That is unacceptable! It is too long. Just wish me best regards for my whole day! That is much better as it is easier and full of meaning. And that greeting can also be used for all times.
Students: Best regards teacher!
Teacher : That's better, sit down! Listen today I,m going to test you all on words that have the opposite meaning. When I say a sentence or word, all of you must answer quickly the opposite meaning to the words, understand?
Students: Understood teacher!
Teacher : I do not want any disturbance!
Students: (silence)
Teacher : Clever!
Students: Stupid!
Teacher : High!
Students: Low!
Teacher : Popular!
Students: Calafare!
Teacher : Wrong!
Students: Correct!
Teacher : Stupid!
Students: Clever!
Teacher : No!
Students: Yes!
Teacher : Oh God!
Students: Oh Slave!
Teacher : Listen to this!
Students: Listen to that!
Teacher : Quiet!
Students: Noisy!
Teacher : That's not a question, stupid!
Students: This is an answer, clever!
Teacher : I'm dead!
Students: We're alive!
Teacher : I'm lazy to teach!
Students: We are hardworking to learn!
Teacher : Enough! Enough!
Students: More! More!
Teacher : Stop! Stop!
Students: Start! Start!
Teacher : Why are you people so stupid?!
Students: Because I am someone clever!
Teacher : Lack manners!
Students: Taught enough!
Teacher : O.K. Lesson has ended!
Students: K.O. Lesson has not started!
Teacher : Enough, stupid!
Students: Not yet, clever!
Teacher : Stand up!
Students: Sit down!
Teacher : I said CALAFARE was wrong!
Students: We said POPULAR was correct!
Teacher : You people are dumb!
Students: We are gifted!
Teacher : All of you must stay back this afternoon!
Students: Released tonight!
Teacher : (Keep quiet, gather her books and went out)
lame huh? Im bored lol.
Here are some tongue twisters:
Sally sells seashells by the seashore. The shells Sally sells surely won’t sail But since Sally sells sea shells and not ship sails, Surely she’ll sell all the shiny sea shells she’s soon shipping on sale.
There once was a woman Named Uma Mona Newman She nimbly made feminine M&Ms
She didn’t like a lot of ‘em She only liked the minimum She loved the mini-cinnamon And the aluminum chrysanthemum.
So Uma Mona Newman Nimbly made for the millennium A minimum of feminine Yummy mini-cinnamon Chrysanthemum aluminum M&Ms.
If two witches were watching two watches, which witch would watch which watch?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? He would chuck, he would, as much as he could,and chuck as much wood as a woodchuck would if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk
Betty Botter bought some butter, but she said “this butter’s bitter! But a bit of better butter will but make my butter better” So she bought some better butter, better than the bitter butter, and it made her butter better so ’twas better Betty Botter bought a bit of better butter!
A flea and a fly flew up in a flue. Said the flea, “Let us fly!” Said the fly, “Let us flee!” So they flew through a flaw in the flue.
Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers. Did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, where’s the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
Perspicacious Polly Perkins purchased Peter Piper’s pickled products And peddled pretty popular pickles to produce a pretty proper profit!
If you stick a stock of liquor in your locker, It’s slick to stick a lock upon your stock, Or some stickler who is slicker Will stick you of your liquor If you fail to lock your liquor With a lock!
Mr. See owned a saw. And Mr. Soar owned a seesaw. Now, See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw Before Soar saw See, Which made Soar sore. Had Soar seen See’s saw Before See sawed Soar’s seesaw, See’s saw would not have sawed Soar’s seesaw. So See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw. But it was sad to see Soar so sore just because See’s saw sawed Soar’s seesaw.
Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot. But Shott say she shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot, or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott, then Shott was shot, not Nott.
However, the shot Shott shot shot shot Nott not Shott.
Greek grapes go great draped on crates of crushed dates.
There was a young fisher named Fischer Who fished for a fish in a fissure. The fish with a grin, Pulled the fisherman in; Now they’re fishing the fissure for Fischer.
